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Thursday, September 18, 2008

Halloween Ramblings.....

Well...it is just around the corner!!!! I found myself at Wally World the other day to pick up a few things and was astonished to see the entranceway lined with shelves brimming of morsals of sugar!!!! It never ceases to amaze me what they come out with each year to package and sell to the consumers that want to be "the cool people on the block with the cool candy"!!!!
While sifting through mounds of chocolate, a shiny black & orange box caught my eye one row over. As I approached this find, I thought to myself what a brilliant idea!!! Kernels popcorn individually wrapped mini bags of microwave popcorn ~ and are you sitting down...when it pops it pops "orange". Not from the butter inside the package, but from the small amount of food coloring (aka...die) dribbled into each package! Hey, it all can't be good for you!!!
Seeing as I had previously done popcorn wrappers for microwave popcorn and toothfairy tins in my last post...I had an ah-ha moment and thought this will be perfect for the little trick or treaters on Halloween nite!!!! (Not to mention, their mother's may ooooh & ahhhh at the packaging job that I am gonna do over them!!!!) So I guess I will be working diligently on that project for the next month and a half! LOL!!!
Because of my luv of popcorn...this got me thinking about what the worst Halloween candy we got as a kids was. The candy selection has come a long way since I was a little one (braving the cold, sometimes snow covered grounds in our plastic apron style costume that tied over our snowsuits, and not to mention the plastic mask that was sure to crack just below your chin from the bitter cold, and tear away at your lower jaw all night long!!!! Even the costumes are much more plush these days!!!)
So here is my top 10 list of thee worst candy to hand out on Halloween:
10. Mini boxes of Raisins ~ these always seemed to be covered in some wierd form of waxy crud, had to be washed before they were eaten, and let's face it....they were healthy!!! Come on people!! This holiday is about sugar, not spice!!!

09. Apples....after all...fruit is nature's candy! Now I don't know if they were bruised when they got dumped into my bag, but they sure always managed to come out that way. File that one right into the garbage!!! Uck!! P.S., Please see #10 for health concern.

08. Mary Jane Kisses ~ that would be the proper name for those taffy concoctions that are wrapped in the black & orange wrappers. This really has zero flavor to it, and you may just be deemed pathetic if you find yourself actually scrapping the bottom of your sack to eat these droppings. Shame on you people for buying these and passing them off as ligitamit "candy"!!!

07. Circus Peanuts - wow...these may even have less flavor than #8 - take a peanut and cover it in a rough bland shell, put it in a fancy box and call them Circus Peanuts!!! These always had a way of making their way out of their container (maybe it was the expensive packaging process) and into the bottom of sludge in the base of my bag.

06. Dental Floss or Toothbrushes ~ are you lookin to be cleaning hardened on egg yolk off of your front porch screen door on November 1st? I heard toothbrush work really good for getting into the screen netting. Really....how dare you!!!!

05. Double Bubble Bubble Gum...from last year!!! The stuff that you tear open and pop into your mouth, biting down and realizing your back molars just ripped out? Thanks so much for thinking of me!!!! You may as well have thrown in a handful of Chalky Valentine Hearts from February and some leftover Peeps from April! What the hey!!!!

04. Any, and I mean any...banana flavored candy. Laffy taffy, runts, whatever shape or form, this idea was simply WRONG!

03. Juice Boxes....ummmmmm....yah, I really don't have anything to add to that one.

02. Anything Carob - this is simply the wrong. Your 'mocklate' should never have crossed the threshold of your granola eating home into my collection of chocolate treasures. Cardnal rule of Halloween - don't mess with the chocolate....if it is safe for the dog to eat, I don't want it!!!!!

01. Pennies....for real. Look, you are a kid and you already have to lug around a pillowcase full of crap....as if it isn't heavy enough. Pennies are filthy, heavy and they are worth...well, you figure it out!!! That is really just ghetto!

15 comments:

Stephanie said...

OMG this is soooo wicked cute!

scrappinmominky said...

Hilarious! I love your ramblings and agree with every point! My kids do to although they like juice boxes, lol.

Thanks for sharing. I found you on the blog thread at SCS.

Heather
scrappinmominky.blogspot.com

Chrystal said...

I nedd to find that popcorn! Too Cool!

Lorraine said...

love the card...it's perfect. tfs

Becky Sorensen said...

I love love love the card!!
I plan on visiting Wally soon so I need to see if we have it up here. The kids would think it was awesome.
hugs,

Elke said...

Bella way too cute..are we having popcorn tomorrow when i stop by???

Darlene (SCS:akronstamperdpk) said...

OMGosh ... your Halloween ramblings were hilarious and I enjoyed each moment and topic!!

Mandy said...

Too funny!!

Tessa said...

OMG! This is too funny!!! Wandered here from SCS!

Stampin' Meg said...

Ditto- I always hated those black and orange wrapped taffies ICK!!!!!!!!!!!

Loretta Rodger said...

I can't stop laughing, I just love it! This card gives 'witch' a new meaning! roflmao

Scrubbysue said...

Hahahahahahaha....this is cute and so fitting for the blog title...LOL

Michelle said...

LOL! I love a lot of the candy you didn't! We could have swapped bags! LOL! I like the fresh version of most of those though - not the aged ones! LOL! Funny post!

Pat (mspfd) said...

LOL funny. TFS!

Victoria said...

Your blog is so fun. I love your Halloween don'ts list.